MY Voice

There has been a theme this past month in other blogs about that internal, annoyingly negative voice.  Much of it is helpful - quieting the voice, using the voice, ignoring the voice, just getting busy.  However, there are also suggestions the voice must be remnants from your parents or teachers telling you to drop art and get serious, or something to that effect.

Well, (sigh) I'm a little weary of reading that excuse - for art or anything else in life.  I'm sure it's true for others, but we're not all tortured artists - picked on and bullied by the less enlightened meanies in our lives.  I cannot think of one single person of importance in my life, or even non importance really, who ever told me to give it up.  Okay, one - my high school guidance counselor wanted me to pursue engineering, but he did not scoff when I was set on art.  In fact, the only negative comment that comes to mind is my graphic design professor telling me I needed to be more serious about developing my portfolio.  I think he sensed I was not passionate about graphic design.  It was my major because I (me, myself & only me) thought I needed to find a way to make my art pay since I (again, just me) felt I couldn't possibly be a good enough artist to make a living otherwise.  No teacher ever told me this.  Friends were supportive.  Art exhibit judges were complimentary.  The local junior college art instructors asked me to attend there.  (Seriously - not trying to brag here, just showing the lack of meanies.)  My family was completely supportive.  My parents were proud and vocal about it.  They wanted all their kids to follow whatever dreams we had.

So, where does the nagging voice come from?  The only thing I can come up with is DNA. *shaking fist*  Dang ancestors!  I believe some people are just hard-wired with a perfectionist nature and if you can't do something perfect the first time, why try?  That's what I fight.

If you're an artist, buck it up, stop blaming whoever & just get busy.  If you have an artist in your life, by all means be supportive.  But, don't feel like you have to tip toe around their fragile egos.  I find many people are too nice - complimenting regardless of what the piece really looks like.  I value my husband's opinion because I know he will be honest.  He likes to brag on me occasionally too, but he's not going to praise just to prop me up.  If I'm working on something and it doesn't feel right, he can give me perspective of what seems wrong to him.  I like that.

Now, back to work.  Time to quiet my own negative voice - to prove MYSELF wrong.

Growing My Own Branch

After reading "Steal Like an Artist" by Austin Kleon, I am now on a secondary mission - collect artsy fartsy books.  Let me clarify...

Steal Like an Artist and my current read, "The Art Spirit," recommend studying the great art masters as well as more modern artists you admire.  Research your favorites first and then their mentors and then the mentors of their mentors.  Kleon calls this your creative lineage - climbing up your (artistic) family tree.  That's ridiculously clever and I love it!  Study each of them intently, copy them (strictly as practice - as study of technique) and keep climbing until you have a conglomerate of "teachers" helping you improve and define your talent and style.

I've started out with Edgar Degas, Edward Hopper and John Singer Sargent.  There are a bazillion, or at least a few dozen, more I want to research.  I should start with just one, but it was simply too difficult to just pick one.

Our library is great.  However, it has a finite art book collection and I'm spending enough on my art tools.  Soooo, if any family or nearby friends happen to read this particular post, keep your eyes peeled for cheap or free books about any artist who draws, paints or sculpts in a semi-realistic to realistic style.  Also art instruction books - figure drawing and such.  I bookmarked a list of recommended older art instruction books that I will be keeping an eye out for.  If you ever notice an artsy book for a quarter at a garage sale, grab it.  I'll reimburse you, take it home & decide if it's worth space on my shelf.

Dream a Little (art) Dream

blind contour

pen sketch

Yesterday?  Blind contours - Bleh.  A good exercise for eye/hand coordination, but my perfectionist hates the results.  As soon as I finished them, I HAD to sketch the same subject.  See - it's not all happy pretty art in the ole sketchbook.

Five days in & this little venture has now invaded my dreams.  It's part of the journey & variety is a good thing, so . . . The Dream . . .

First day of classes, first semester as an art major (the 2012 me).  Loving my classes - some art, some not.  I enter a large crowded room thinking it's Modern Printmaking.  Exciting!  I'm not really listening to the reading of the syllabus (who does, right?) and instead chat with an old friend while removing everything from my bag searching for a drawing pencil.  I realize we've been split into two groups and I can't hear a thing the tall skinny eastern European instructor says.  He soon moves to our side & stands by an old projector, but I still can't understand him and can't see all that well because of my stupid contacts.  (I'm sure this came from my discovery last night - in reality - that I can see much better while drawing close if I take out my contacts.)

Back to the dream.  Everyone is writing on Etch-a-Sketches or tiny little digital pads with a stylus you have to put together.  I am completely confused.  A fellow student furiously pokes the buttons on her pad, answering questions for some test.  I have NO IDEA how anyone knows what the questions are.  Only then do I realize the name of the class is Qualitative Analysis. (Does that really exist?)  Oh yeah - the math class I had to take to complete my gen eds.  I hear - "It's actually easy & fun if you know a little bit of QA." . . . right.  Magically-appearing paper tests are handed in - except by me.  I leave - going directly to the Art Department to drop QA and get into Modern Printmaking, but the office is dark and I don't remember my advisor's name.

Then the cat woke me up, so we'll never know if I'm in Modern Printmaking or still sitting in QA wishing I had an Etch-a-Sketch.

Happy Doodle Cats

Day one seemed a successful start to this journey.  Then Tuesday was crazy and I was tired, so stuck with happy/silly faces.  Wednesday was long & I was tired, so it was a doodling day.  (I justify it as showing my imaginary readers that you don't have to do realistic drawings to keep a sketchbook.)  Today was busy & long and I just got to my sketchbook at 9 pm.  My brain - "Now what?!? Don't you deserve a break?"  The other side of my brain - "NO - Don't give in already.  Draw EVERY SINGLE DAY!" ... sigh

a few of the faces

So, instead of deciding what to draw I grabbed the Drawing Lab book and did the first exercise - draw a bunch of really quick cats... I mean quickly draw a bunch of cats.  I believe you're then supposed to play around with your favorite one - redrawing, adding color and such.  I'm making the rules & I declare this lesson a two-parter.  Part one is done & so is this day!

doodles

1 of 30 cats  

D(raw) Day

I woke to my brain yelling "YOU'RE GOING TO DRAW TODAY!" . . . sigh.  Yup, Open the Sketchbook Day aka D(raw) Day aka Aaaaaagh Day had arrived.  I was thankful today's incredibly busy work day kept my mind off the looming first page.

The perfectionist in me wants to point out
mistakes, but I'll just say that those are kids arms,
not little extremities growing from her shoulders.

I arrived home later than usual, ate chocolate, put on comfy Fall socks and picked up a relatively "new" sketchbook with three drawings in it - from 1998, 2000 and a few months ago.  Now what?!?  I stared at the beginnings of a nose I'd been sketching from a magazine ad.  No more thinking!  Just grab the 4B & start shading already!  My first scratchings brought annoyance & impatience for the page to be done and perfect.  Then the familiar mantra crept into my brain - forget what it is, just stick with the lines and shades.

45 minutes later . . . time to be done.  Ah - back in the groove and I've brilliantly let you know so I can't start slacking off already.  However, in an effort to avoid driving you nuts or bore you completely, I will initially post 2 or 3 times a week, maybe less if that gets irritating.  Whatever the results -  comical or sad or wonderful - I'll share stories or photos or both as we trek forth.


PS - Did YOU draw/sketch/doodle today?  Smiley faces, stick figures or random designs count too.  It's not what you do, but that you JUST DO.

The Art of ProcrastinArting

 Continuing from the last post . . .  The nudging of my daughter began working on me.  I researched books to revive my artist.  I bought An Illustrated Life, Drawing Lab for Mixed-Media Artists and Sketchbook for the Artist.  All wonderful, but the first was especially inspiring.  Hmm - yes, I could start a new sketchbook, but I didn't - yet.

The final tipping point, that final heavy straw, if you will, was an unexpected sale on Prismacolor pencils.  I had a 60 piece set from my college days, but many are nubs and some are lost and I've long wanted a new set.  We were traveling and shopping and I was in the mood to splurge.  So I did.  On the drive home, I sampled the new pencils in an old sketchbook I'd begun carrying, but never used.  My brain began scheming how I could "do" art again.  I formulated a plan - document the lovely colors of my new and old pencils.  Get the feel of it again.  Then, I'd finally be ready to create.  So, I organized my pencils by color and made pages of shades & lines.  Hmm, now how would they look in number order?  More procrastinating. . .  Come on already - you need to be held accountable!  Then I stumbled upon a few art blogs via Pinterest.  AHA!  I already blogged (infrequently).  I could do this.

Well, imaginary reader - you and me - yep, we're almost there.  Almost to D(raw) Day & we're going to kick this artist in the indigo blue heinie!

ProcrastinArting - Page 1 of 8

ProcrastinArting Page 7 of 8

WAIT - don't go yet.  Speaking of kicking in the heinie... A few of you have mentioned wanting to join this journey.  Well, now is the time people.  Grab a sketchbook, journal or random notebook & a good pen/pencil.  We'll start together Monday.  Prior skills NOT required.  Make your own rules.  Sketch, doodle, write, or draw blindfolded.  It's not about what you can do - it's about DOING!  So let's DO!

Mom, just paint SOMETHING!

 My daughter moved into her first college apartment last month.  "Mom, paint something for my wall."  I've heard it several times now, but I just don't know what to do.

Over the years, my parents gave me various sketchbooks and pestered me now and then to draw again.  It hasn't stuck.  My daughter is the antagonist now.  Two years ago she bought me 642 Things to Draw.  A fantastic book of prompts & blank space.  I drew exactly 3 things.  Last year she gave me a lovely wooden box with an easel & drawers filled with inexpensive paints to play with and rediscover my painter.  I love it!  I used it twice.  For Mother's Day, I received The Artist's Way - a book I had borrowed once from my writer sister, but never did anything with.  Now I was determined to follow the 12 week plan it set forth.  I wrote the required daily pages... 3 times.  Rats - started over a month later... didn't last.  Started over again... yeah, not going anywhere.  I still want to get back to it, but so far - anything I have to do in the morning?  Not happening folks.  The one daughter gift I have used more is a book of mandalas to color in.  My theory - you don't have to think.  Pick up the colored pencils and just fill it in.  So, I'm carrying that theory into my sketchbook - not a lot of thought (yet) - just do.

Monkeys sleeping at the end of Too Many Monkeys.
A favorite bit of the last illustration.

From realism to idea sketching to the final page - Here's a bit of the creative process for the children's book my sister wrote and talked me into illustrating 5 years ago - Too Many Monkeys.  She's also persistent & I am grateful.

Marmosets in the banana line & Mandrills "sharing" ice cream.

     

ProcrastinArting

Ponder.  Plan.  Dream.  Set goals.  Imagine.  Buy art supplies.  Organize art supplies.  Make excuses.  Change goals.  Get preoccupied.  Dream some more.

I want to revive my art.  My procrastinating perfectionist nature is tripping me up.  The last artist on this list is soooo me.  The ways to avoid putting 4B pencil to acid free paper are nearly limitless & I've nearly exhausted those ways.  Time to get off the proverbial couch and just do it already!   Well, not quite yet . . .

The journey commences on (insert dramatic sound effect) . . . September 24, the first Monday of Autumn.  I'm completely weary of heat & Autumn's relief makes me joyful!  On that day the artist will be given permission to open the sketchbook and venture forward.  In the meantime, read "What is this trek?" for my very short backstory.

This next week will be used to share a few of the hangups and a few of the nudges (shoves) towards creativity.  Stay tuned dear reader (or imaginary persons I've dreamed up to be readers... or Mom, Susan, Amy & Becca) - whoever has read this far - stay tuned.